Soccer….Family Style


USMNT vs Canada, and The Keg Stand Reaction
January 30, 2013, 1:12 am
Filed under: Supporter Culture, US Soccer

AODSMKegstandI know I should be upset, because we looked like crap, but honestly, I’m stoked. I’m looking forward to the Hex. I have what is (G-d I hope) not an over-rated confidence in Klinsmann. And tonight, as chapter leader for American Outlaws Des Moines, I helped move our chapter bar to The Keg Stand.

After several great years at Victor’s, it was time for us to find a bigger home for AO DSM, a place that we could settle into before the 2014 World Cup. Victor’s has been good to us (including this week, as they have been referring people to our new bar….super classy) but it was too small for our 2010 World Cup crowd.  The Keg Stand has capacity for 600, offers more beers than you could hope to try in one game (one of our new guys said he’d had three different IPA that were all awesome). It has a soccer-friendly management, and it has a back room that in one game already feels like the AO DSM clubhouse. So yes, the play sucked, but I feel giddy that we found a new place that feels like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

But if you really can’t stand all the hearts and flowers, go read my AO brother Ryan Rosenblatt’s blog. He’s being silly tonight. Made me smile. And next time, join me at the Keg Stand with the rest of AO Des Moines. They made even THIS game not suck. And rest assured, Klinsmann knows what he’s doing. It’s all good people.

BRING ON THE HEX!



500 Days to 2014 World Cup in Brazil!
January 28, 2013, 11:23 pm
Filed under: FIFA, International Soccer, US Soccer | Tags:

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FoxSoccer’s Facebook page posted this image with the announcement that the 2014 World Cup is 500 days away. Let’s just say we were more excited about this than the kids’ 100th day of school Friday. 500 DAYS!!



Isn’t That Cute? @USSoccer Tweets a tease! #USAvCRC #USMNT
January 15, 2013, 10:43 am
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

Oh US Soccer, trying to be all coy and charming with their tweet “We’ll be announcing the location for the first #USMNT home World Cup Qualifier today. #USAvCRC on March 22. Where do you want it played?” Are you effing kidding me?

I know US Soccer likes to drag these announcements out until airfare is insane and fans are tied up in knots, but now they’re really pissing me off. My gateway drug to soccer was as a USSF referee, and I at one point was a State level referee, considering making an attempt at becoming a National referee, so while it’s been a while since I was a “career” referee, I do remember my endless hours of training from the very organization jerking us around today. You know what we’re trained as referees?

1. Don’t make promises you can’t keep. If you say, “We’ll be announcing this week.” to Grant Wahl, then make the announcement when you said you would.

2. Be predictable. Referees had so many sayings like “a good referee is never surprised” and in turn, doesn’t surprise their players and coaches. Nobody likes being led on, on the field or trying to make plans to get to it.

3. Be humble and show your genuine personality. We fans have been waiting to here this announcement for WEEKS, if not months. Posting a cheeky “I know something you don’t know” tweet at this point is just douchie. Apologize for the on again, off again announcement, and just tell us where we are going already.

C’mon US Soccer. I’m only asking you to stand by what you taught me. Is it KC, SLC, or Denver? Or some totally other idea. Just get on with it already.



Portland, Don’t Make Me Cut You
January 8, 2013, 9:16 pm
Filed under: Supporter Culture, US Soccer | Tags: , ,

I’ve been pretty clear that I’m only 100% confident when I’m chanting “US Til I Die.” I am pretty passionate about soccer in general, and I’ll stand with almost any supporters section, typically with me US Soccer buddies from around the USA. But, as previously reported, I’ve had a special place in my heart for the Portland Timbers for the past eight years, and purchased several Rose City Til I Die items without a hitch of hesitation. Timbers were the centerpiece of last Summer’s MLS Road Trip, and it makes me happy to think of Timbers Army and the friends we made there, as it made me happy to read Grant Wahl’s tweets about Portland perhaps getting to host a World Cup Qualifier next Summer.

Then I read Andrew Brawley’s Op Ed on Timber’s hosting, and I can honestly say that I’m disappointed for the first time by a Timbers Army experience. He whines about the recent USWNT games held in Portland as being over-run by pre-teen and teen girls, and complains about AO’s chants being stale, and implies that they are below the awesome that is Timbers Army. In addition, he feels that Timbers Army is only qualified to bring it to Timbers games, which was as close as he came to making sense and sounding informed.

First of all, for those of us who’ve experienced USWNT and USMNT games, I think we can say that the two don’t look at all alike. Are the USWNT games drawing better atmosphere at meteoric rates….yes, absolutely. But it’s not the same as a USMNT match, and a USMNT match isn’t the same as a USMNT qualifier. Many of us who travel and bring the noise (and the giant flag) to US Soccer have to pick and choose our games. I dream of the day I can make every men’s game and every women’s  game, but that’s just not practical, as I’m sure Andrew could understand, since he admits not even dropping the coin to see USWNT in his own back yard, a concept that’s insane to those of us for whom EVERY US Soccer and/or MLS game is a road game.

Second, nice to brag about being a “torch bearer among American Supporters groups,” but fold your hand before it’s been dealt in taking it to the next level of supporting American soccer. Does AO sing U-S-A more than I’d like? Yes. Is it a reasonable thing that happens in a new supporters group …particularly one that doesn’t play an annual regular season where we can meet up and practice an arsenal of song and chants? YES. I capo US Soccer games, and we sing a variety of songs and typically have new chants made up for that particular opponent. You might not hear them on the broadcast, but it’s there in the stadium. It makes me wonder if Andrew’s ever experienced a USMNT match in person? I certainly have, and I’ll say this about American Outlaws: we tifo stadiums, despite the fact that our members carry all that stuff in, paying airline check fees and not having the luxury of leaving it in a stadium storage locker. We sing songs and chants over multiple sections, with variety and unison that hasn’t happened before AO started. And we do it all without any local bar or HQ where we all get to meet up and organize week after week. Show some respect, son.

Third, I know you’re better than this Timbers Army. I blog as a soccer mama, so please picture my disapproving glare when I say “you’ve really disappointed me, I expect more from you.”  When I came in for Timbers vs Chivas, I had the good fortune to meet Phyllis Hayes, and not Andrew, who probably would have freaked out that my pre-teen daughter might ruin his night. Phyllis showed my kids how to do some Timbers traditions, and made us feel welcome by running to the office to copy off the song sheet as well as the sheet of songs that were new to the Army that night. I’ve SEEN YOU INTRODUCE NEW SONGS!! I know Timber’s are capable of hosting USMNT and maybe, just maybe, teaching American Outlaws a few things, but that won’t happen with an attitude expressed in Andrew Brawley’s Op Ed.

I hope Timber’s Army and Portland do get to host a USMNT World Cup Qualifier this year. It is a great town with a great soccer culture. And American Outlaws are better than you give them credit for, as we were fully capable of singing along with Sporting KC Fans, because you know what? We all DO love bar-be-que! I’m sure we would be just as accepting of what Portland has to offer, even if “we all don’t love locally sourced gluten free” isn’t quite as catchy…I’m sure you have something we can sing. As for the AO songs you clearly haven’t heard, don’t worry Andrew, my five year old will show you how it’s done.



On to the Hex!!
December 27, 2012, 8:46 am
Filed under: International Soccer, Supporter Culture, US Soccer

It’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for, USMNT Fans! It’s been torture, waiting for US Soccer to give us some news. Sure, we all wanted to know where Hex games are before the holidays for our eight nights of airline and game tickets, or Santa delivering gifts of gas money and hotel rooms. But at least now we have some information on where we are headed in the Hex! Read on:

LINCOLN, Neb. – American Outlaws, acting unilaterally, is pleased to finally announce the home game sites for the final round of qualifying for the 2014 World Cup Finals. Due to the fact that the United States Soccer Federation (USSF) has not announced game sites, the nation’s premiere fan organization signaled where the group will convene on each game day in the hopes that the team will follow suit.

March 22, 2013 – Costa Rica – New York, N.Y. (Rucker Park)
June 11, 2013 – Panama – Des Moines, Iowa (Hatton Cottage)
June 18, 2013 – Honduras – Savannah, Ga. (East River Street)
September 10, 2013 – Mexico – Washington, D.C. (J.Edgar Hoover Stadium)
October 11, 2013 – Jamaica – Green Bay, Wisc. (Lambeau Field)

Home qualifiers start in New York City with a March 22nd match against Costa Rica. Historic Rucker Park will host the first home match of the hexagonal round at Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Stadium. Tickets for the contest will be available by contacting Fat Joe and Slim on the corner of 155th St. and Frederick Douglass Blvd. 

For the first time in the history, US Soccer will play in Iowa as the Yanks hit the Heartland where it hurts by playing in Des Moines, Iowa. Infamous Hatton Cottage will host the match in the first match at the small pitch. The teams will play a 3v3 match on the grounds of the Victorian-Style Hatton House which will host the Outlaws Pre-Game Party & Clam Bake.

A week later, Jürgen Klinnsman’s team will be in for a street fight against Honduras on the cobblestones of Savannah, Ga. In a surprising choice, the Outlaws have chosen to come to the Hostess City of the South because drinking is allowed on the streets and the cobblestones of the city’s riverfront are much smoother than any football pitch in Central America. The city was founded in 1733 as the first Capitol of the Penal Colony of Georgia.

On September 10th, the Yanks host hated rival Mexico in a special one-off home game at the temporary J. Edgar Hoover Stadium which is located in the courtyard of the J. Edgar Hoover Building in Washington, D.C. No admission will be charged for the contest and fans from both nations will be welcome in the first international match held on Pennsylvania, Ave.

The United States’ final home qualifier will be against Jamaica in Green Bay, Wisc. Historic Lambeau Field will host its first international match against the Reggae Boys on what is expected to be a frozen tundra. The game in Wisconsin will be the Yanks’ first trip to the state since falling to East Germany in 1990, 1-2. That game was played in Milwaukee.

For more information about ticket packages, please visit TheAmericanOutlaws.com. The official US Soccer Hexagonal Schedule will be released on March 21st, 2013 in order to give supporters plenty of time to sort out travel plans. All games will be shown on BeIN Sport. If you don’t have BeIN Sport, don’t worry, nobody else does either.

**Many thanks to my AO brother “Big Fudge” for the write up, and the Des Moines hat tip, in response to my lamenting the lack of information. Maybe if I ask US Soccer as nicely for information, they’ll write me a press release too. C’mon Sunil….tell us where we’re going this year!



CSI: SKC, How Sporting KC Got My USMNT Banners Back
November 3, 2012, 8:18 pm
Filed under: International Soccer, Major League Soccer, Supporter Culture | Tags: , , ,

I was watching my son’s final soccer game Wednesday, when my phone rang with a number I didn’t recognize from Kansas City. Usually, I let numbers I don’t recognize go to voicemail, but on a whim, I answered, and a man asked if I was Tanya Keith. I said yes, and he started speaking in a very serious, deep voice: “Tanya, this is Chris Wyche, Vice President at Sporting KC. I want you to know that we take things very seriously here at Livestrong Park, and when someone does something that isn’t right at our stadium, we track them down.” That’s a paraphrase, because honestly, his voice was so firm and dark, I was frantically wracking my brain for what I possibly could have done wrong, or maybe one of our American Outlaws Des Moines members had gotten in trouble….I couldn’t imagine, since we’re far from the rowdiest group of trouble makers.

He continued, “ We’ve been able to locate your banners.” OH PHEW! We’d traveled to Boston to visit family right before the World Cup qualifier in Kansas City, and on our travels, had met my friend, Prairie Clayton, the artist behind the AO Des Moines banner and many other great hand-painted banners supporting US Soccer. She’d asked us to carry two of her banners to hang at the game while we were hanging the AO Des Moines banner. When she asked, I almost said no. Having been to Livestrong Park before, I knew that the banners would be hung far above the supporters section, and it always makes me nervous, having her works of art hanging so far from my watchful eye and protection. I mentioned the placement of banners to her, but she wanted to send them, so we took them along with us, and hung them along with our own American Outlaws Des Moines banner.

The game was fantastic, and excellent win to finish out the round of World Cup qualifying, and the banners were still hanging, every time I glanced up, even after the final whistle. I helped Doug fold our 20×30′ stadium flag, the Midwest Mama, and took the kids into the Member’s Bar while Doug went to fetch the banners. All was right with the world….

Then I got the text: “I have our banner, but Prairie’s are gone.” My worst nightmare had come true, worse than my own banners getting stolen, someone had taken banners that had been entrusted to me. Horrified, I found stadium management and told them about the theft. Their response was amazing, taking the problem very seriously with no fit throwing on my part whatsoever. They took me to the place where SKC tifo is stored, but the banners weren’t there. They took down my name and number, assured me that they would be able to track them down, and would be in touch.

The next day, I posted photos of the missing banners with pleas for help getting them back. My post got lots of retweets and reposts, and one of the AO Kansas City guys told me the stadium was taking it very seriously, and he would keep me posted on the investigation. Then a local station in KC picked up the story, and broadcast about the theft. Prairie and I were both touched. Even if the banners were never returned, it was nice to have a front office and community give so much respect to supporter’s work. Then I read a post on the American Outlaws leadership board: through stadium security, they had identified the people who took the banners, and they were working on contacting the thieves to get them returned. CSI Sporting KC is serious business apparently, because it was only a few days later that I got the above mentioned phone call that both banners were being returned.

In this day, with so much animosity between MLS front offices and supporters, it’s refreshing to see a stadium run with such a strong commitment and support of the people who create the atmosphere and energy that MLS likes to use to market their product. From the initial meeting with stadiums ops, to the diligent work to return banners to their rightful owners, Sporting KC showed that they are a cut above in creating the kind of culture that I want to see in American soccer. They have my profound appreciation, and increasingly, my support as a fan. Looking forward to learning more about the organization to the south, but for now, a huge thank you for supporting supporters to everyone that helped get banners back to the artist who made them. FYI…Prairie’s banners are for sale, and she does commissions. You can contact her via Twitter @hoover_dam, or message me and I’ll be happy to get you in touch. If you don’t have a team to watch in the MLS Playoffs, I suggest you check out Sporting KC against Houston next Sunday and Wednesday.



It’s Go Time in KC
October 16, 2012, 2:42 pm
Filed under: International Soccer, Supporter Culture, US Soccer | Tags: , , ,

We got to Kansas City last night and are headed to the stadium for what should be one of the best US Soccer atmospheres ever. We went to the Open Cup final in KC, and I was blown away by the atmosphere Sporting has developed for their MLS club. Fireworks, tifo, singing….this is not the supporter culture of their Wizards past. Tonight should be fantastic.

We got to the stadium at 10 AM to hang banners, set up the Midwest Mama stadium flag, and help American Outlaws lay out their stadium wide tifo. The usual security briefing is “don’t do this, don’t do that…” But at Livestrong Park, we were instructed that their goal was no arrests, no ejections, and a stadium so loud, the players wouldn’t be able to hear the final whistle. I’ve never working with stadium front office that’s so supporter friendly.

Combine that with supporters coming in from all over the US, and it’s lining up to be a great night. This is a special game for our family, not just because we get to see some old friends we usually only see at World Cups, but it is our family cap #97, 98, 99, and 100. (37 for Tanya, 31 for Doug, 20 for 10 year old Betsy Ross, and an even dozen for 5 year old Captain America…he outgrew the Uncle Sam outfit). So look for us by the Midwest Mama flag, singing our hearts out to victory and on to the Hex!



Keep Calm and Qualify
October 12, 2012, 5:09 pm
Filed under: International Soccer, US Soccer | Tags: , , ,

There’s been a whole bunch of panic this week about US Soccer. Players hurt, players sick, questions of who’s been called up and who hasn’t….wrenching of hands and stomachs across the US Soccer family of supporters. I need you all to keep calm out there, because you’re making me feel old.

We’ve been here before. If you’ve watched US Soccer for a few decades, you know, qualifying in CONCACAF is hardly ever fun or easy, but we usually find a way to squeak it out. I know, I know….I had tickets to the Olympic qualifier in KC that never was, but this is not the same thing. We likely need 4 points out of the next 2 games, and that’s achievable. We have good players that are not Donovan or Jozy. I’m excited to see Graham Zusi light it up, Michael Bradley is back in, and I’m fired up to watch Alan Gordon head one past the defensive wall I’m sure Antigua and Barbuda will throw up.

So head out to your nearest American Outlaws, Sam’s Army, or US Soccer bar, grab a beer, and let’s support our boys into the final round of qualifying for Brazil. It takes more than two island nationals to hold us back!



Here We Go!
September 4, 2012, 7:00 am
Filed under: FIFA, International Soccer, US Soccer | Tags: , ,

The Jamaica Home/Away roadtrip is underway! Yesterday, I watched my husband referee Minnesota Soccer’s win over Western Kentucky, and today, we fly to Montego Bay for the away leg of the qualifier. We’re off to a great start.

Our airport shuttle driver was Mexican, and was as excited as we were to talk CONCACAF soccer, even though I opened the conversation with “Didya see the US vs Mexico game in August?” He liked my rendition of Mexican beer ads in Spanish, and I think was impressed that a couple Americans were so familiar with the history of the biggest rivalry in CONCACAF.

We arrived at the airport in our USMNT jerseys, Doug’s vintage 2002, and mine the current Where’s Waldo? We were through O’Hare security in record speed when a guy in business attire stopped me and said “Nice jersey, are you coming from or going to a game?” I’ve never been stopped by an average American who knew 1. What a US Soccer jersey looked like and 2. Their playing schedule. You’ve come a long way, America, and you’re making me proud. Just think, my kids could grow up in a world where soccer fans aren’t the lowest form of American sports fan….

Next stop: Jamaica, for cliff diving, Blue Mountain coffee, rum, a reprise of our 1995 honeymoon, and hopefully, an excellent soccer game.



My Relationship With MLS: “It’s Complicated”
August 15, 2012, 5:17 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I got a message via Facebook the other day from my friend, Richard Hayes, a Richmond, VA, DC United supporter whom I met last year while he was representing American Outlaws RVA chapter. He’d been reading my blog about my MLS Roadtrip and after apologizing and respect for my love of soccer, he wrote:

“What confuses me is your chameleon like attitude with visiting other teams and supporters on your recent MLS Roadtrip. Is it the supporters atmosphere that attracted you to this trip? I have tons of respect for all the supporters that spend time, money and passion supporting their team but I can only do the same for my team. Last month I visited family and friend in Seattle and enjoyed a Sea vs. Col game but I couldn’t jump into the Seattle chants cheers could it would have felt like cheating on a lover. Don’t get me wrong I had a good time and enjoyed the beers and companionship but I think I enjoyed the glares for wearing my DCU gear just as much. Do you not have an MLS team that is truly close to your heart?”

With his permission, I’m reposting so I can answer publicly. I’ve thought about my answer for a few days, and the shortest answer I’ve come up with is my relationship status with Major League Soccer would be “It’s Complicated.”

I’ve lived in Des Moines, Iowa since the beginning of MLS, but I’d just moved here in December, 1992 and had no intention to staying when the league was launched in 1996. Kansas City Wiz had nothing to offer my Jersey girl self-image, and there wasn’t another team within a reasonable drive. I made a point to go see the New York Metrostars while I was refereeing a tournament in DC, thinking it made sense for a Jersey girl to root for them, but even year 1, DCU had some great supporters (and I’m not just saying that because I know all of RVA DCU will read this). I had such a great time with them, I immediately switched allegiance and became a DCU fan.

That lasted until the Chicago Fire launched in 1998, when my husband played the Jersey and local angle: Chicago was about a 5 hour drive, and they were initially coached by Bob Bradley, who is from my hometown, Montclair, NJ. We went to a few games, and again, I was won over by the supporters club, who would get the whole stadium involved with their chants from the various color seats of Soldier Field (now East and West sides of Toyota Park, and let’s not forget the upper deck!)

I stayed with the Fire until April 2007, when they did something absolutely unforgivable. They signed my most hated player, Blanco from the Mexican team. I can’t really express how much I hate Blanco, but in my estimation, he is the dirtiest tackling, diving, whining jerk of the team I hate most as a USMNT fan. I sat next to a German during the 1998 World Cup who was watching England play Romania because he couldn’t stand to watch the German national team because they were all the players he hated from Bayern Munich’s opponents. I couldn’t understand what he was talking about until the day I learned that Blanco was in a Fire jersey. I broke up with the Fire and vowed to never fall in love in the MLS again. The US national team was my lover, and I was done opening myself up to the risk of betraying them ever again by cheering for a club that might one day hire a mortal enemy of my beloved.

Then I started writing this blog, and people started to ask me which clubs I supported, and you all don’t like the answer “none.” Plus, my kids started getting older, and I wanted to take them to MLS games. I’d already had an amazing experience with Portland Timbers while they were in the A-League, and of course I should interview the two closest teams to me, Chicago Fire (despite their past transgression) and Sporting KC (who mercifully ditched their less marketable names).

I re-evaluated what I was looking for in an MLS team. My passion has to be directed at the supporters, not the team. I try to not even look at rosters, so that I don’t get angry at some USMNT arch-enemy joining the ranks, and I can be pleasantly surprised if a USMNT hero joins the team, because I’ll recognize him. I wanted to find a team that made me want to go see games because of their fans. I wanted to look forward to the next tifo, the next original song, and the coolest traditions.

My recent road trip confirmed my suspicion: Portland Timbers are the team for me. Going to their game as part of my 2012 MLS Roadtrip made my supporter heart want to burst. I wanted to soak it up from start to finish. Timbers Army members were so friendly, they have so many great traditions, great songs, an unbelievable resilience in the face of going down a goal, great tifo, and let’s just say it….Tetris freaking rules. I’m gone for them, and that’s all there is to it.

There’s just one problem: they’re ridiculously far away from where I live.

I need a second team, one that I can hope to bring my kids to with some frequency and little expense. I’d been going to Fire games and really didn’t think Kansas City could hold a candle to their atmosphere. I’d been to a few Wiz/Wizards games at Arrowhead and Community America Ballpark, and frankly, the atmosphere sucked. But after a few Twitter conversations with members of their SG, the Cauldron, I felt I had to give them another try.  To watch a mercy game, before committing myself back to the Fire.

So when the MLS Roadtrip pulled into the Open Cup final of SKC vs Seattle Sounders, I thought I was being very fair, humoring Sporting at their little championship game. Don’t worry Sporting fans, I’m going to give you your on blog post for the show you put on, once I come back to my senses, but it’s enough to say for now that I underestimated you, and I apologize. If you haven’t seen Sporting KC lately, you haven’t seen them at all. Sporting, I stand corrected.

Where am I then? I love a team a VERY long drive or expensive flight away, and as for Chicago and KC, well, it’s complicated. All I can say for sure is if you’ve got an SG with great fans pouring their hearts out for their soccer team, chances are I’d be willing to stand and scream with you for a game somewhere on your schedule.